Top 10: Best Xbox LIVE Arcade Games

Well, Sweet Clyde's recent XBLA post got me thinking: what are my favorite XBLA games of all time? More importantly, which would I rank as the best? Well, I've done some thinking, and here's my list. Let me tell you, this was no easy feat. Hell, you can look at my Gamertag over on the right side there and see that I haven't even played that many Arcade games (compared to full-length retail games). I've played somewhere between 20 and 25, which is a lot more than most people, though. So, how did I make this list? First, my favorite games make the list. It's that simple. There are some other constraints, though. Remakes and ports aren't awarded as highly. Also, while I did factor in price, you'll find that the best games tend to run you $15. Finally, I never downloaded Soul Calibur or Battlefield 1943, and that's why they're off the list. I'm sure I'd love both, for the former came out right before Soulcalibur IV and the latter came out right before Modern Warfare 2, so they weren't in a lot of demand during their respective releases. I'd get 1943 now, but I don't see the point anymore since DICE has said they're only going to be supporting Bad Company 2. Anyway, here's my list for the 10 best games the XBLA has to offer.

10. Mega Man 9
The tenth spot on this list was the hardest to determine. Seriously, I nailed down the first 9 really quickly, but deciding on a tenth was difficult. What made me put Mega Man 9 on here instead of Marvel vs. Capcom 2, Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo HD Remix, The Secret of Monkey Island, and Perfect Dark was the fact that it's an original game. Plus, major, major props for making a new game with NES graphics. If you look at my 'cheevos, you'll see that I still have no Gamerscore for this game; that's because I can't even beat it once. This game is hard as shit, and there's a miniboss on Hornet Man's stage that I can't get past. Either way, playing the first 7 levels was a blast, even if I did get frustrated.

9. Aegis Wing
This game gets major bonus points for being free. It also gets bonus points for being a project done by some interns. But what really puts it on this list is the fact that it's really fun (especially with 3 friends), and it's got a bumpin' soundtrack. If you haven't played this game, just imagine R-Type with friends, and--more importantly--what the fuck are you waiting for!? It's free!!!1!! Go download it NOW!

8. Catan
This is a straight adaptation of the Settlers of Catan board game. Ever played Monopoly or Chess online? Same thing, but with a much, much better game (than Monopoly). It has a nice interface, some soothing tunes, and a pretty devoted cult following online. If you're a fan of the board game, or even board games in general, I highly recommend picking this one up. Also, if you get tired of all the assholes you find online, go play some Catan with strangers. Friendliest online community ever.

7. Ikaruga
This game will fuck your mother, sodomize your father, and shove an ice pick under your toe nails. It is balls in a vice hard. It requires so much memorization to become successful that even a one month absence will knock you back to square one. That being said, Ikaruga gets my vote for best 'shmup of all time. It's dynamic, expertly paced, beautifully patterned, and a whole mess of fun. It's also more rewarding than any game I've ever played. It hones the shit out of your gaming reflexes. Give the demo a try, and if you're man enough, download the whole game. This game was at full retail price for the Gamecube, but you can get it for a mere $10 on XBLA.

6. Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
I love a good Metroidvania game (exploration-based platformer), and this is one of the best. Originally a Playstation 1 title, this was the first Castlevania game to combine the series with the Metroid formula, and it did so with great success. I never played the original, but I had played Aria of Sorrow and Dawn of Sorrow (GBA and DS, respectively), so I was familiar with franchise. If you've never played a Metroidvania-type game, this is an excellent place to start. Just remember: use your map, don't get frustrated, and "mist could pass."

5. Geometry Wars 2
The first Geometry Wars was probably the best game on the Xbox 360 until Dead Rising came out...and it was only $5. That is hands-down the best $5 I've ever spent. Why isn't that game on the list, then? Well, because the sequel surpassed the original in every facet of the game, and I didn't want to put both of them on here. This game has the same frantic gameplay, but now in six excellent modes. Throw in a clever leaderboard system, an improved multiplier system, and 12 fun-filled Achievements, and you've got a recipe for success. You'll never put your analog sticks to better use, and if you haven't tried it yet, get your ass in gear: it's on sale this week.

4. Castle Crashers
I only got into this game recently, even though it's been out for over a year and a half. The reason? The Behemoth's first XBLA offering was a port of a Flash game called Alien Hominid HD, a Contra-style side-scroller, and I effing hated it. Hated it. It wasn't until Sweet Clyde's constant pestering--and a six pack of Yuengling--finally wore on me enough to get me to shell out the dough that I finally realized what a winner this game truly is. It's a side-scrolling beat 'em up, but with a clever magic system, a dose of humor, a boat-load of unlockables, and infinite aerial combos. It's the best-selling game on the Arcade, and if you haven't picked it up yet, you might want to give it another look.

3. Shadow Complex
This is the second Metroidvania game on this list, but this one is neither Metroid, nor Castlevania. From the studio that brought you the piss bucket known as Undertow came one of the best games on the Arcade. Granted, Chair was bought out by Epic Games before they made this title, but it was still a surprise turnaround. It was really hard for me to decide whether I like SotN or Shadow Complex better, but I think that, in the end, Shadow Complex gets my vote because it's an XBLA orginal, and it's a lot more Metroid than it is Castlevania. I. Love. Metroid. Plus, it has the Foam Gun. The Foam Gun is awesome. Here's my suggestion for you: don't play the demo. A demo could never do this genre of game justice. Go to Metacritic and read the reviews. If that doesn't pique your interest, I don't know what will. Oh, and if you're a fan of Super Metroid and you haven't bought this game yet, do me a favor: punch yourself in the face...then go buy this game. If you haven't played Super Metroid, then go download it onto your Wii. It's a steal at $8.

2. Braid
This game reinvented the platformer as we know it. Jonathan Blow's (practically) one-man project is an absolute work of brilliance. From its gorgeous water color visuals, to its clever time-bending gameplay, to its quirky soundtrack, to its enigmatic story-telling and tone, Braid is a must-play for any gaming enthusiast. It was one of the first games to hit the $15 price point, but it's worth every penny. Plus, I mean, come on, support the little guy.

1. Portal: Still Alive
Well, here we are. Number one. If you anything about me, you know I have a major hard-on for Portal. It's the best game on the XBLA, the best game on the 360, and the best game of this generation. 'Nuff said.

--Chilly P

p.s. I realize that first paragraph was poorly written, but I'm-a leave it as is. It's too garbled to fix at this point.